29 Mom Jokes Guaranteed To Make You Laugh So Hard, You’ll Need a Time-Out
Click through for the best quips, cartoons and one-liners about the funniest job around!
Motherhood is a journey like no other. There are diapers to change, dinners to cook and tears to dry. And sometimes managing it all seems impossible. But one way moms can do it all is with a little bit of humor and grace. Maybe that’s why there are so many mom jokes out there!
What are mom jokes?
We’ve all heard of dad jokes — those cheesy, punny (and sometimes funny) quips that abound on sitcoms and in real life. Mom jokes, on the other hand, highlight the humor in caring for kids and dealing with toddler tantrums, teenage eye rolls, mood swings and everything in between — and beyond! So grab your kiddos and be prepared to laugh way past their bedtime at these 26 mom jokes.
Being a mom 101
- Q: Why do moms always say, “Because I said so?”
- A: Because, “Because science” isn’t always a good enough explanation.
- Being a parent means never having a moment to yourself. Even in the bathroom!
- Mom’s recipe for iced coffee: Have kids. Make coffee. Forget you made coffee. Put it in the microwave. Forget you put it in the microwave. Drink it cold.
- We can’t all be Pinterest moms — some of us are made to be Amazon moms!
Moms and money
- A boy asks, “Mom, can I get $20?” She replies, “Does it look like I’m made of money?” Son: “Well, isn’t that what M.O.M. stands for?”
- Steve and Linda’s son was always calling from college, asking for money. So the next time he asked, Linda said, “Sure. I also noticed that you left your physics book here. Should we send that too?” “Um, sure,” responded her son. Later, Steve was shocked to hear Linda had sent their son $1,100. “But don’t worry,” said Linda. “I taped a $100 check to the cover of his physics book, and a $1,000 check on the inside. He’ll never see it!”
- There’s nothing quite like being told I’m wrong by someone who depends on me for food, clothing and shelter.
A mom’s work is never done
- I’m going to donate these bags of outgrown baby clothes to Goodwill. But first, I’m going to drive around with them in my trunk for two months.
- I hate when I’m waiting for Mom to cook dinner — and then I remember I am Mom.
- Being a mom is constantly cleaning up after a party you didn’t attend.
- Mom’s casseroles come in two sizes: not enough and enough to feed an army with leftovers.
- I love my kids—not enough to flip the chicken nuggets halfway through cooking, but I love them.
- After searching several rooms, a woman asked her daughter if she had seen her newspaper lying around anywhere. “Newspapers are so old-fashioned,” the young girl said as she handed her mother an iPad. “People use tablets these days.” Her mom took the iPad, disappeared into the other room for a bit, then came back and said, “That fly didn’t stand a chance!”
- How do you know when something is officially lost? When mom can’t find it.
If being a mom were easy, men would do it!
- I don’t want to sleep like a baby. I want to sleep like my husband.
- Q: Why is Mother’s Day before Father’s Day?
- A: So the kids can spend all their Christmas money on Mom.
- “It’s okay, honey. All I need is a combined total of three hours of sleep,” said No. Mom. Ever.
- What three words solve Dad’s every problem? Ask your mother.
Motherhood has its own language
A mom texts her teenage son while he’s out with friends: “Hi! What do IDK, LY and TTYL mean?” He texts back, “I don’t know, love you and talk to you later.” The mom replies, “It’s okay, don’t worry about it. I’ll ask your sister. Love you!”
For more laughs, click through the links below!
Things Kids Say That Are So Cute and Funny They’re Guaranteed To Make Your Day
31 Nurse Jokes Guaranteed to Make You Laugh So Hard Your Stitches Come Out
Jokes About Cats That Are So Funny They’ll Have *You* On All Fours!
28 Diet Jokes and Cartoons So Funny You’ll Laugh Off the Weight!
