Chrissy Metz Talks Faith, Confidence and Silencing Self-Doubt: ‘We Can Do Hard Things’ (EXCLUSIVE)
Plus, the ‘This Is Us’ star discusses how her new children’s book helped heal her inner child
The right role can change your entire life. For Chrissy Metz, this opportunity arrived in 2016 when she landed the part of Kate Pearson on NBC’s award-winning series This Is Us. Now, Chrissy is a two-time Golden Globe nominee and is known by millions for her memorable portrayal of Kate—a character who often faced heart-tugging struggles throughout the entirety of the drama’s six seasons.
But one of Chrissy’s earlier, lesser-known roles was also pivotal in her life: preschool teacher. “I always knew I would do something in early childhood education. I love kids—they’re so funny, they keep you so present, they’re so authentic and real,” Chrissy tells Woman’s World. “And I love that, well, unless they’re too honest.”
Her star-studded journey from teaching to acting, singing and writing a New York Times bestselling children’s book was not without its hardships though. “I think there’s this idea that if someone has found success or happiness in life that they’re somehow exempt from heartbreak,” says Chrissy as our cover girl this week (get your copy here). “But I’m here to tell you that’s not true! Life will always come with challenges that ebb and flow, but what matters most is how we react to them. There are different seasons in life—some good and some not so good—and I believe there is a purpose for each of them.”
Chrissy also credits her steady faith as another anchor during difficult times. “I’m just so grateful my grandmother instilled faith in me because it’s what got me through some of the darkest, most trying times,” she shares. The 44-year-old adds that there’s always a beautiful silver lining in navigating these turbulent moments. “It took a while, but I’ve realized that trying times make you more confident and resilient in the long run,” says Chrissy. “We’re all here and we’re learning—and every day is a lesson. Every hour, every minute. And we are all so much stronger than we even know.”
Here, Chrissy sits down with Woman’s World and opens up about finding confidence in moments of self-doubt, harnessing the power of positive self-talk, easing fear and finding light amid the darkness in this exclusive interview:
Woman’s World (WW): Your first children’s book is bestseller When I Talk to God, I Talk About You. Was this book inspired by your own faith?
Chrissy Metz: I’ve always wanted to write kids’ books, but I didn’t know where in the world to start! I’ve had so many ideas. Bradley [Collins] and I had kicked around ideas for the first book, and one of them had me asking myself: How do I pray? Where do I pray? What do I say when I pray? And the book idea really came from a place of wanting to establish a relationship with God, and instilling that in young readers’ hearts and minds. Many think we can only pray at church or only in the morning or only at night. So it was just a gentle introduction to prayer that I wanted to put out in the world. And then when the book did so well—which I’m so grateful about—we did the accompanying lullaby album, which was really cool to do. We were lucky enough to be offered a second book.
WW: That’s amazing. Your second book, When I Talk To God, I Talk About Feelings, is out now. Why do you think this book’s message about feelings is so important right now?
CM: After the first book was released, we had book signings and went to local churches and different schools. And every single kid, no matter what their age was, wanted to talk about their feelings. I feel like it’s really indicative of our time and how we break generational trauma and generational cycles of not talking about feelings. One would say, you know, sometimes at night when I go to sleep, I feel scared, or sometimes I feel kind of embarrassed at school. And that’s where the idea sparked.
I felt this was something that could make a massive dent in the most positive way. So I was like, well, then our second book will be When I Talk to God, I Talk About Feelings. So we just naturally landed on it. The message is so important right now because people of all ages can learn from it.
Writing the books and the music has been very cathartic for my own inner child, too. If you didn’t have parents who were comfortable talking about their feelings, this practice is so helpful. My inner child was like Oh, I like this. I feel hurt. I feel pain. I feel important. I feel confident and bolstered by effectively communicating my feelings. So, I think no matter what age you are, your inner child needs this.
WW: Speaking of feelings…how do you deal with difficult everyday emotions like anxiety or fear? Any tips for overcoming them?
CM: Recently, I have been going through so much anxiety and wondering, like, my gosh, what’s gonna happen next? And always thinking, when’s the other shoe gonna drop? And I have to remind myself like crazy…And we’re going to figure it out. It was refreshing for me to realize things will happen no matter what. And you just ride the wave, and sometimes it’s a very, very fun wave, other times it’s a scary wave, and then sometimes you’re like, Oh, I never want to do this again.
That’s precisely when we learn our lessons—lessons can give purpose through any struggles. These experiences can also make you more confident, more resilient, stronger. And for me, tough times bolstered my faith by just allowing me to spend more time in my relationship with—and in my connection to—God. Even people who aren’t religious or don’t have a faith-based background, when they have the most trying times, the first thing they do is pray because what else do you do?
WW: Those are such uplifting reminders. Are you doing anything specific lately that is bringing you joy or positivity through trying times?
CM: I actually did a 21-day social media fast this past January and I also—no matter what—do my gratitude list and my prayers in the morning and this has allowed so much more positivity to come into my life. I’m not saying there’s no positive aspects of social media. It can be really important sometimes, but taking a break opens up more time for other things. This sounds silly, but I didn’t even know Duolingo had tournaments—and now I’ve done a Duolingo tournament in Italian just because I had more time! So many positive things came out of this break and it wasn’t even something that I expected.
WW: Social media can also sometimes incite self-doubt. Do you have any advice for women facing this?
CM: Positive self-talk is so important. At the end of the day, confidence really is just trust in yourself. And so every time you put your one foot in front of the other, make a mental note and say, Oh, I did do this. And then you’re like, Oh, I made a deposit into my ‘confidence bank.’ Then you can look back and whenever you need a boost, you have that memory in your bank.
It’s like, yes, I can move forward, and I can keep going, and I can do that. And the more you do it, the more you have. We can all do hard things, we really can. I also always say I would rather have tried something and failed than to never have tried—because nobody wants to sing a shoulda, coulda, woulda song. I’d rather say I tried than sit there wondering what would’ve happened if I did. Also, when it comes to lack of confidence or fear of failure or imposter syndrome, what helps me is realizing and knowing that every single person feels this way.
WW: Switching gears slightly here…you’re on the cover of Woman’s World’s St. Patrick’s Day issue! Can you share what makes you feel lucky in your daily life?
CM: I believe gratitude is so powerful. I always start each day with 10 things that I’m grateful for before I even step out of bed. I’ve done this for years. And I know this to be true—because it’s happened to me—that the more grateful you are, the more you receive, which is so wild. Gratitude is key.
I have seen what gratitude can do and what it’s done in my life. It’s really, really powerful. And I always say, you can’t keep what you don’t give away. So, the more gratitude you have, the more you’ll receive and then the more abundant you can be in giving and being of service. It’s all cyclical. If we were all doing that we would all be taken care of.
WW: Do you have any other actionable ways you relieve stress?
CM: I love meditation and journaling. Sometimes I just have to get things out. Also, music is very healing for me. It’s so rare that I listen to any music and don’t cry. And that’s very cathartic.
But lately walking and weight-lifting, like strength training, helps relieve my stress. Even if I’m literally resistant to it and I’m like, no I don’t wanna do it. I say to myself, but how do you feel afterward? Remember how you feel afterward. That helps me go for it. Or just like, before I want to eat something that might not make me feel good. I’m like, but how will you feel after this?
Another actionable tip I love is grounding which may sound very woo-woo. But putting your bare feet in the grass, especially after you’ve traveled, just to ground yourself works wonders. Simply put your bare feet on the ground for a few minutes…I’ve found it very helpful and very freeing. It’s why I think so many people benefited during COVID lockdown while gardening. It’s because their hands were connected to the earth. And they’re growing something, they’re nurturing something. So, whether you’re in a garden or you’re just doing a little grounding work. It really centers you and is such a great stress reliever.
Pick up your copy of When I Talk to God, I Talk About Feelings —out now!
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