MAKE LOVE Last Forever: Change your Beliefs, not your Bae
Article presented by Tom White
Despite more dating apps and options than ever, finding lasting love remains a challenge. With almost 50% of marriages in the United States ending with divorce[1], is it even realistic to expect that love lasts forever?
According to The Magnetic Mindset Studio, love can be reignited anytime by creating a Peak Love State which enables us to stay in love with the world, with ourselves and our partners. PLS can be achieved by creating a safety and pleasure response in the nervous system.
Author of 8 Rules of Love: How to Find It, Keep it, and Let it Go, Jay Shetty says “I think the reality is that we think that there is a perfect person waiting for us out there. … there is no perfect person … it’s who you have energy and enthusiasm to invest in with”[2].
When it comes to making love last, most relationship coaches basically say the same thing. Change your pattern not your partner. Doing this puts you in control of your love story.
But is it too much to hope for a love story of our own? Or is that just reserved for those in the movies?
“No woman should ever have to give up on love and settle for less than what she desires”, says Manka Bajaj, Life Coach featured in New York Weekly among Top 10 Industry Disrupters in 2022.
“You don’t need to give up what you desire if you can upgrade your beliefs about what you deserve. If you desire something but don’t feel you deserve it, then it won’t feel safe. If it doesn’t feel safe, it won’t stay because our brains are wired to avoid danger”.
“Here’s the caveat. What’s not realistic in the movies is how to source love. In the movies, love flows from the outside in, in the form of a lover. For the women I work with, love grows from the inside out, and is sustained by strong roots of self-love”.
“We can’t fully control how the other person shows up in the relationship. And when they don’t show up in the ways we need them to, we can feel unloved. It can be very painful when our partners don’t meet our needs and don’t change for us. If they leave us, we often either doubt ourselves or we doubt Love itself. And right there, we disempower ourselves and give away our agency as curators of our love stories”.
“Keeping your faith alive in those moments is the hardest part”, says Manka, “Many of us have been there. Sometimes, I too, am still there. The next time you are triggered by your partner, what if, you give yourself permission to be angry and hurt? You are still loveable”.
Her advice for the next time you feel lonely or unloved: “Instead of getting on a dating app, take yourself on a date”, she smiles, “maybe a romantic weekend by the beach? Prioritize pleasure by feeding the five senses until your body, mind and soul become fully alive again and vibrate with love. This is what we do in Month 3 of my coaching programme Love Again to trigger a relaxation response and cultivate Peak Love State”.
Manka shared her own struggles after 13 years of a relationship ending. Her pain motivated her to study Love deeply and pursue coaching as a career. Her path led her to found The Magnetic Mindset Studio, where she created Love Again, a coaching programme designed to keep love alive by sourcing love from within.
“Every time I have cultivated Peak Love State, that is when the most dreamy, juicy love has walked into my life, in the form of a man”. Manka has coached women from all over the world to be able to do the same.
Can love last forever? “Love lasts as long as you believe in it. Love can’t be proved, she says, “If you don’t believe they love you, their words or gestures, won’t be able to prove otherwise”.
Schedule your Love Again discovery call at https://www.mankabajaj.com/
[1] The High Failure Rate of Second and Third Marriages | Psychology Today |
Revealing Divorce Statistics In 2023 – Forbes Advisor[2] Interview: Jay Shetty Reveals His 8 Rules Of Love | The View – YouTube
Members of the editorial and news staff of Woman's World were not involved in the creation of this content.
